I think it’s time I try to move on from this girl. She’s been my beat friend forever, and she’s meant everything to me. I know she thinks highly of me because for anything and everything that matters in her life, she asks me to do it. I’ve gotten her jobs, written applications, cover letters, resumes, letters of recommendation, etc…she’s said no one can write like I can, and that no one can flatter her like I can.
But, that’s all that ever happens. It sucks because she will vocalize and say things like “oh if I’m into a guy, he’ll know for sure, cuz I make sure to flirt with him in a very forward and obvious way. There’s no question” so it sucks to hear that.
But, you know what? I got a gf, I got girls into me. Isn’t it funny we always want the one that doesn’t want us!?
So, I deleted her from my life tonight. Phone # gone; facebook gone; friends gone; I should delete her bro, but he’s legit and young and needs advice.
I guess I should delete him too. I’d feel really bad doing it. But at this point, short of two other girls, and an ex-BF of hers, I have no way of ever contacting her again. I want to tell her I love her, but I don’t think she feels the same way toward me. I know she loves me, but I think she loves me as one would love a sibling. So it’s not healthy for me to think of her, to contact her, to love her. I must move on. I must do whatever I can to forget her.
What’s really the saddest about this, is that I bet I will never hear from her again, until she needs my expertise. And trust me, I don’t give a shiiit about wordpress, so this writing and the poems and the stuff on this are nothing but crap in comparison to the stuff I actually have written in paper. I mean after all, you really think I’m going to just give out pure perfection for free?
Please. Publishing is only the first step for my real talent, and this fake ass wordpress site is but a step in my way.